The following are some tips on how to conduct yourself if you find yourself in the courtroom, either in a divorce scenario or if you are accused of a criminal act.
- Do not expect the Judge to make the "right" decision. There are three directions the judge can go when making a decision: Your way, your spouse's way, or the Judge's way. As you can see, two out three are not in your favor.
- Try to settle as many issues as possible before entering the Court Room. See Tip #1.
- If you have an attorney do not speak unless asked to do so by the Judge.
- When addressing the Judge call him/her "Your Honor." When a Judge puts on the robe, they believe they are entitled to respect and want to be treated as such.
- Always thank the Judge when you are finished speaking. Always be respectful, see above.
- Never speak to or make comments to your opposition or their lawyer when you are before the Judge.
- Leave all hostile and negative emotions at the door. Do not make faces or gestures when the judge or the other side's attorney is speaking. Judges see this and do not appreciate it.
- Be courteous and respectful of the other side; this does not mean you have to agree with them. In twenty plus years of practice, it has been my perception that being nice tends to help you get your objective, all factors being equal.
- Dress appropriately. Your attorney will have a certain strategy on how he/she wants you to be portrayed. Therefore, consult your attorney on how he/she wants you to dress.
- Take notes. Bring paper and pen or pencil with you; don't leave anything to chance. Your attorney will be very busy during the process and cannot remember or write everything down.
- Do not take children into the Court Room unless told to do so by your attorney. This is your case, not your children's and they should not hear what goes on in that room.
- Be prepared. Bring as much information, documentation and any pertinent documents that you possibly can with you whenever you go to see your attorney. It is better to have too much ammunition than to be caught short.
- Bring a book to read as you might have a long wait before your case is heard.
- Do not talk to anyone about your case except your lawyer unless your lawyer has told you to do so. This includes relatives, friends, and especially anyone connected to the other side of your case. These persons could wind up as witnesses against you one day.
- Remember, the Court is going to be looking at you and how you behave, both in and out of the courtroom. Be prepared mentally to defend every single action you undertake.
